MEMORY 3 | "The Viceroy there was a brute who hunted not animals, but humans."

[cosmetician]

EARNED: Clovis & Cecilia, Day 67, 6/8/2014 [did not play]
TAKEN: TBA
WITNESSES: Roxy.

❚ the memory itself ➙

Chapter 33, page 24 here for a higher resolution.

❚ what is learned ➙

● Another "old" memory. Anyone who saw this memory can immediately tell that this one happened only a short while afterwards.
● The rotten core that is the Empire's "true self" is exposed in this memory. Corrupt, sadistic people are in power and they make life hell for everyone that isn't just as corrupt and sadistic as themselves. Included is the background knowledge that anyone who protests or tries to openly change things end up tortured or outright killed. There is absolutely zilch as far as security or safety goes unless you're part of a privileged few.
● These experiences are a crucial part of why she decided to join the revolutionary army and oppose the Empire, although there's still some important pieces missing.
● The feelings of fear and self-disgust are potent in this memory. There's anger over what's going on, hatred directed at the viceroy and his accomplices.......but above all there's a terror present in every waking moment that her true feelings will be found out and she'll be killed, with a painful aftertaste of self-disgust for starting to become numb to the horrific things she's seen. In this memory, "you" (Chelsea) are trapped, surrounded by enemies, playing along with (although not directly participating in) the barbaric cruelty that surrounds you in order to survive. As "you" are utterly helpless, this is all you can manage, and the only person you can trust or rely on is yourself; everyone else might betray you, or be killed themselves and hurt you with their loss.
● fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

❚ what this means ➙

○ This explains a lot about the feelings behind why she behaves, thinks and feels the way she does.....the paranoia, the cynicism, all of that. So while she feels more justified about being so mistrustful, because she now remembers the source of those feelings, she also gains the perspective needed to recognize that she's being deeply irrational and taking her paranoia too far. Kyriakos is obviously not at all like the Empire, so while taking this memory will be unpleasant, doing so will actually prompt her to try and socialize more outside of her team.....and even open up a little around her teammates.
○ fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck